i'm still around...

b and i took our 94-year old grandma out for lunch today at Harvest the "fancy" restaurant at thanksgiving point. all she kept on saying was "i'm still around, i don't know why, you know i am 94, everyone else is dead, both my parents died at 70, i don't know why i'm still around?" after telling her over and over there must be a reason and that we love her, really, the poor thing just wants to go home. can someone just kill me at that age if i start doing this. i mean she IS legally blind, and legally everything else if we are going to use the "legal" term. poor thing she can't do anything she ever used to and that is so hard for someone who was so energetic and full of life.

b and i made a pact that we are going to go sky diving and break all our bones at 90. that way we won't kill ourselves, but we know that once we had a broken bone, our time would come quickly. so a few hundred broken bones would only be a couple of days.

at lunch i couldn't decide. i literally changed my mind 4 times with the waitress. and i mean, the waitress walked away and i had to go find her again. first i ordered the parmesan-garlic zucchini which was, tempura battered zucchini and yellow squash with a smoked tomato ranch dipping sauce. it sounded so good and i hadn't had any fried food, one of my nemesis'. let the mind games begin. i wanted to be good, but really started justifying. how big are they? are they sliced thin, thinking i could eat just a few slices? all my questions were responded to with answers that didn't work for me. i ordered them and then had serious regret. i knew if they came to the table i would eat the whole lot. so i couldn't let myself fall into the trap. where is the waitress?

so then i decided to order a salad instead, spinach with caramelized walnuts, dried pear, and gorgonzola cheese with a strawberry-balsamic vinaigrette and order pistachio halibut as my entree. i hadn't really eaten a big meal since last saturday and i did deserve it, even though i was going out to dinner tonight. okay, that is what i'll do, where is that waitress?

as took my seat i was pondering the menu again thinking about my choice, i saw there were other salads on the menu that i hadn't seen before, the guilt for ordering such a big lunch kicked in. where is the waitress? i knew she was putting our order in so i had to change quickly to the turkey cobb. that seemed more healthy, i love eggs in salad. okay so excited!

because i still have a menu i looked at the other salads. a different one caught my eye. am i embarrassed at this point yes. but what she doesn't realize is that she is feeding someone who hasn't eaten anything big for like a week. a ravenous dog. b is like, really? are you serious and looks around to see if anyone is noticing my fickle behavior. i don't care, i am changing my order.

i had to walk back in the kitchen and ask the other guy to find my waitress, i think she was in hiding. i had to tell her that i changed one more time to the antipasti steak salad. tender steak, semi-dried tomatoes, artichoke hearts, gorgonzola cheese, prosciutto, salami, olives, capers, and tuscan peppers served with a citrus balsamic vinaigrette. it was so good and a healthy choice. i'm sure b tipped well as his compensation for embarrassment.

bite of b's pumpkin soup
bite of grandma's halibut
one slice of whole grained bread with BUTTER
steak salad
tiny bite of grandma's free birthday creme brulee, just to see if it was as good as mine. nope!